aku adalah angin...

as free as the wind...

Showing posts with label Ms Wind. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ms Wind. Show all posts

perhaps...

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (0)

u're just two different puzzles all put together, becoz none of the pieces fit each other.
now u're falling apart inside, tired of constant trying,
u realize u gotta stop, there's nothing else u could do.
just let go, move on...
perhaps, that's the only thing u could do...

dear my dear...

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (0)

kamu bukan lagi parah, tapi tenat!!!
sebagai satu-satunya entiti yg paling dekat dgnmu, aku turut berasa sakit.
jadi terserahlah;
if a mask can make it easier to deal with, then put it on...
but u must understand,
that all the masks u're wearing will only make u suffer even harder.

note to self

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (0)

it's not a fair game u play...
sehingga kamu tahu apa sebenarnya yg kamu inginkan...





or do u?

u did it eventually. walaupun kamu sempat muntah dengan teruk sebelum betul2 mampu melakukannya.

it's been like forever of holding ur breath and at the end of it, kamu mengambil kata putus untuk menamatkan segalanya on a single fateful monday afternoon. the endless painful agony has finally ended, because of that single fb post. setelah kamu tersedar bahawa kemunculannya dalam hidup kamu tidak lain hanya untuk membuktikan teori kamu selama ini memang benar. lucu kan, semuanya sama saja walaupun sekeras mana mereka cuba membuktikan mereka berbeza. dan kau sempat mempercayainya!!!

but now, the weight that has been on ur back has been lifted. u survived. today, u're still breathing. u're still alive.

alive to do the things u wanna do. alive to do the things u should do. alive to stay the course u know u have to take. alive to keep the promises u had to make.


for the most part, there was a price to pay for that victory, both physically and emotionally. kamu terluka teruk, seperti terjatuh dari langet dan terhempas atas batuan gurun yg panas menyengat... but like all the hellish trials in ur life, surviving them results in u changing ur entire perspective of life. consider urself the luckiest person in the world. u still have God's Grace. well, it's hard to dispute that now even for an agnostic u, rite?

yet life goes on. u can waffle on about how u've been feeling for the past couple of years, drunk on the triumph of the moment and excess energy that has kept u going in the darkness, but the truth is, the world still turns and life still goes on...


selamat mecipta memori yg lebih indah... dan semoga kamu lebih berhati2 agar tak kecundang lagi!!!

congratulations!!!

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (1)

u've successfully reached ur 30th years of life by being single...


so,
another 30 years of living alone,
all on ur own wouldnt be so hard then...!!!

somehow u will...

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (0)

kadang2, the only thing u can do is pray, which i know is the hardest thing to do bilamana kau sering sekali mempersoalkan Penguasa Langet samada Dia betul2 mendengar doamu.

dan bila seluruh ruang lingkup kehidupanmu is based on objectifying and cataloging every moment of setiap pengalaman dan rencah hidup yang telah kau tempuh, u know u've hit the deepest end when the only solution u can turn to is an abstract of human faith.


i know, u're now lie in the hard, deep end... sebuah lohong gelap yang tidak terjangkau walau sekilas cahaya pun. and u don't know how u're going to get out of this one.


but trust me, i know somehow u will.

dan Dia juga sentiasa mendengarkan kamu, u know.

ada beberapa perkara in the world that u should not hear, and u have heard it.

ada beberapa perkara in the world that u should not say, and u have said it.

ada beberapa perkara in the world that u should not see, and u have seen it.

ada beberapa perkara in the world that u should not do, and yes, u have done it.

ada beberapa perkara in the world that u should do, but no, u chose not to do it.

nor should u be compelled to, but its sweet call will always be there and u're not but human.

oh God give her the strength and wisdom to see this through. or at least show her a resolution everybody can be happy about.

it hurts doesnt it? to do what u did. to go thru what u did. it always hurts. more so the 1st time u go thru with it. even though u know it's the right thing to do. even though u know there is no other option than what was laid down before u. even though u know it will be by ur very own hand. it hurts. it always does.


when it's over, u'll look back at it knowing that some things in life dont come easy. u'll look back knowing that with that equal amount of pleasure, there has to be the pain that comes with making that choice, going thru that decision. most importantly, u'll look back knowing that it will be the exactly moment in life u started to grow up and make the better choices in life.


nothing in life is ever that sure. u should know, u've debated about it for more than u've realized. it probably gave u more than ur fair share of sleepless night over it. even after it's been done, u're just not sure if u've done the right thing. u don't know if what will happen will ever be the same anymore. all the doubts, all the fears, all the guilt, they just stand in the way of making the choices that u know u need to make. they cloud u from the truth that things aren't what were in the years before this.


but guilt… is a good thing. conscience is what tells u that u're still a good person. it's what tells u that u're still human. dont look to other pple. there's no use. everybody's just the same. u've fallen from ur own graces. u've walked away from ur own conscience, walked away from ur own guilt about the things u have done. the history repeats itself, in a different way. yeah u feel bad, but congratulations, u're still a decent human being.


i, as another u, can't promise u that it's not going to hurt the next time. i, that live in u, can't promise u that the next one will be just as what u went thru before. i, ur very own alter-ego, can't promise anything that lies in the future because really… no one can. what i can tell u is that this time, u'll be better prepared for what may come. that's what life is all about. not in the anticipating the moments, but knowing how to deal with what nightmares and dreamscapes that may come. u'll be smarter then… that much i can promise u.


after all that's said and done, after all that's happened and will happen. life does indeed go on. it may hurt. it may sting. it may feel like there is an empty gaping hole where what mattered most once was. but life goes on and there is no sense in living in that moment of pain. u know because u've lived it before. i was there with u when u did. i'm always with u. u know there was no greater pain than what u've been thru. u know what u're going thru will be over. and u know i'll always be here for u. because no one else will.


u only have me. we only have each other...

the wall

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (2)

dulu
dia bina tembok dari bata ketakutan
bersimenkan kebimbangan dan kekhuatiran...

tapi ada tangan besi
mengetuk dan meruntuh perlahan-lahan
bila tembok dari batatakutsimenbimbang akhirnya roboh
tangan besi bertepuk dan melambai pergi...

kini
dia bina tembok dari bata air mata
bersimenkan kekecewaan dan kelukaan...

demi Tuhan dia bersumpah
tembok dari bataairmatasimenkecewa ini
akan lebih kukuh dan kuat
dan takkan runtuh datanglah mesin besi sekalipun...

sudah terlalu lama
tapi kau masih terdera
hijab rahsia demi rahsia
satu demi satu terbuka di depan mata...





kasihan...
sesuatu yg kononnya suci dan agung itu
tak pernah wujud
sekadar halusinasi kau yg bangang
sungguh,
KAU MEMANG BANGANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it took her like forever to get over the fact that baba had finally succumb to his disease.
now comes another frightening news from someone she always held so close to her heart.
please God, dont take him so soon.

it took her a very long time to finally accept the fact that first love doesnt always meant to be true love.
and for whatever reason that invisible entity is suddenly popping out, haunting her like ghost from past.
please God, dont let her falter again.


God... please, please, please...

even if u handle it with extreme care...
u'll never know when the balloon u blow will pop.








al - fatihah...
(rip)



makcik... what the hell are u doing?!



she's going thru some changes that she needed the most.








good luck!!!

letih melayan permainan takdir
sementara menanti 'detik' yang entah bila kan hadir

hati dan lidah mengalun zikir
sedang otak senak diasak fikir

apa benar pada setiap perjalanan penuh getir
dihujungnya pasti ada bahagia terukir?

dulu
saat waktu semakin suntuk
kau masih sibuk mencari petunjuk

...
...
...


kini
saat hati mula beralah
takdir telah pun berubah



usah dikesal
kerana kau yang cari pasal!

d.i.a.m.

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (0)

diam
bukan bererti tak apa-apa
atau baik-baik saja
atau tak pernah merasa marah
atau merasa terlalu kisah

diam
lantaran tak bisa melakukan apa-apa
atau bilang kalau baik-baik saja
bukan juga tiada amarah
kerana bukan kamu yang memiliki dia
tapi dia yang memiliki kamu

dia dan dia
kini mereka keduanya!!!

... / ???

a heartfelt song by Ms Wind sings along... (0)




mati nyali
antara denyut nadi
...

berhenti di sini
atau terus berilusi
???



dance the streams of the stars in the darkness of the night...



wish your dreams no matter how far would be true and shine so bright.


I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way than this:

...
...
...


unfinished Sonet XVII by Pablo Neruda
(i mean, she is the one who couldnt finished the beautiful lines)

'Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.' - Cyril Connolly -